Ash Ramsunder’s Good Vibrations Blog ‘You Become What You Say’
You Become What You Say
I will NEVER forget this experience for as long as I live… In 2016, after the spiritual experience that I have mentioned countless times, I was in my bathroom brushing my teeth and peering outside at the trees and the beautiful sunny sky. I had just finished a 28 hour shift at the time (those were the days) and no matter where I wash my face, my day feels utterly incomplete unless I do so in my own space. Hospital call rooms just don’t feel the same as your own bathroom does.
It truly was a beautiful day; I was utterly exhausted and in that moment I was truly feeling sorry for myself for having to grind as hard as I did. Also, at the time, I was under immense pressure and I knew how difficult it felt (and was) to continuously try and keep head above water… In that moment of feeling deeply sorry for myself, I projected a thought unto God. It was more a form of idle protest to be honest and I am generally abrasive when extremely tired or hungry.
“Why don’t You just give me the Lotto numbers so that I don’t have to freaking work this much?” I thought.
I said this out of pure exhaustion, frustration and yes, mild melancholy. To my utter astonishment, not even a second after I had said this, an authoritative and unapologetic Voice “spoke” into my mind.
“Because it is My will for you to have you experience Me – and not just my giving… To have you know Me as God – and not as Santa Claus.”
I literally froze in that moment! I was completely immobilized – toothbrush still my mouth – and I remained that way for a few minutes. Nothing else was said – neither from me nor the Voice that projected itself into my mind. I knew this could not have been a mere random thought generated from me. First of all, Santa Claus is not part of my vocabulary – I prefer Father Christmas… And secondly, the Voice spoke with such authority, clarity and undeniable power.
Immediately after brushing my teeth and showering, I went on my knees and began praying in reverence. I did not hear anything else after this but I did feel a deep sense of reverence that lasted all day long and for the next few days after this as well.
This experience redefined how I viewed prayer and exchanges with the Divine. Too often, I had blurred the line between Creator and creation and caught myself believing that prayer was a form of wish-list that you present to God. “Give me this; take that away from me; let this happen; don’t let me go through that…” We have reduced God to a vending machine… Or as He/She metaphorised to me, we have reduced God to Santa Claus.
There is so much that I can say about prayer but I will have to leave this to another article. All morning today, there has been insistence within that I write about Psalms 23. This is a particular Psalm that I say daily. It is my invocation and mantra – and if you have your own that connects you, please continue to stay with that.
For me, there has always been an expansion of spiritual wisdom to that which I was religiously taught. And since I feel so strongly compelled to write about this, there must be at least person that this is meant to strike a chord with.
This is the 23rd Psalm which is well known by people throughout the world. Most people merely blindly recite it but when I invoke it over my life, these are the hidden teachings and inner meanings that I also speak into being when reciting it either aloud or silently. There are many beautiful Buddhist, Hindu and Sufi mantras which could also work just as well – choose what resonates with you best. It is always the intention behind the words that matter the most and for me, this is what resonates best.
Psalm 23
The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not be in want.
He makes me lie down in green pasture,
He leads me beside quiet waters, he restores my soul.
He guides me in paths of righteousness, for His Name’s sake.
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil, for You are with me.
Your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil; my cup runneth over.
Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life,
And I shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever and ever.
“The Lord is my Shepherd”
David himself, before becoming a king, was a mere shepherd – this was his point of reference and understanding of leadership. In today’s terms, we would probably say, “God is our President. He is our Ruler. She is our CEO.”
David understood the responsibilities of what being a shepherd entailed. It was not just idly sitting by and whiling away your time as the sheep strolled by on the mountainside. As a shepherd, he had to constantly be on guard against predators and to ensure the safety of the sheep. He also had to ensure that none went astray and if they did, he would have to reel them in order to keep the flock together. And, as a shepherd, he also knew that it was HIS duty to find suitable land to ensure that there was sufficient vegetation so that his sheep could graze and not starve.
Hence the introduction to the Psalm is a declaration of my willing submission to the HIGHEST Power. It means that as God, He gets to make the ultimate decision; She gets to have the final say. No discussion warranted, and my permission is not needed.
It is also indicates that we would not submit to our own mind, feelings and limited understanding of situations and circumstances, which can sometimes lead us horribly astray. I am definitely guilty of this.
Hence, in these five words alone, there is an acknowledgement of my willing submission as well as an open declaration of my understanding of God’s protection, God’s leadership and His provision.
“I shall not be in want”
This simply means that I lack nothing. You are my Source, You are my Provider. You have equipped me with everything that I need for my journey here on Earth. You have equipped me with strengths, talents and abilities that I can use to create and co-create my life with – and everything over above this shall be provided by You as well.
“He makes me to lie down in green pastures”
Simply put, You bring me to places of abundance – and not only do You bring me here but You also allow me to rest in these blessings.
Far too often (and I am terribly guilty of this), once we have reached a specific goal for ourselves, very rarely do we celebrate, relax and rest in our blessings, accomplishments and achievements. We are far too accustomed to a frenetic pace of live that we sometimes forget to enjoy that which we have prayed for. This line – as much as it indicates God directing us to places of abundance – also indicates that He will willingly slow us down; that She will direct the pace.
“He leads me beside quiet waters, He restores my soul”
“Quiet waters” is an indication that God knows the flow which I can handle. Too heavy a flow and I will be swept away and drowned. This is an important and powerful line for me because when I am in difficult situations and when it feels that life itself is overwhelming and drowning me, somewhere at the back of my mind, I understand that God knows that this is the flow that I can handle. It may not immediately remove the situation but it does give me the faith and impetus to not give up.
The symbolism of water is extremely powerful. Water is used to quench thirst (Lord, let me thirst only for that which You approve), but it is also used to cleanse. Cleansing happens by the water outside of me (that is, everything external to me – situations, circumstances, life itself). It is an understanding that ALL situations – both pleasant and unpleasant – are a necessary part of my soul journey, growth and evolution. And even though, some situations may cause me to feel victimized in the moment, I KNOW that if it is happening to me, it is happening for me… That all things are working in my favour and even when things appear to be going horribly wrong, they are actually going wonderfully right.
And when I am going through pleasant experiences, I have to be mindful to separate myself from the illusion of everyday life… That is not the “things” that I own that restore my soul, but it is “He”. Nothing (that is, “no-thing”) can ever be source of the restoration of my spirit – not a new car, not a new house, not money, not fame… I may lie down in a place of abundance and in green pastures but these provide me only comfort, not restoration. If it is restoration that I seek, then I have to seek God. In other words, for a spiritual condition, I cannot seek a “natural” cure. (Natural here meaning whatever is external to me).
“He guides me in paths of righteousness, for His Name’s sake”
I am guided! I do not have to figure out this journey on my own and as long as God is the one doing the guiding (and that I am not being led by my own selfish desires or ego), I am assured that I am on the HIGHEST path (“paths of righteousness”). And since I am on the highest path, what is there for me to fear?
Yes I can be on the highest path and experience setbacks. Yes I can be on the highest path and feel like life is falling apart. Yes I can be on the highest path and have it feel like I am in absolute hell! All of this is not to punish me but to strengthen me, fortify me and empower me. (It was at this point that my spirit guide dropped another biblical scripture in my mind. I did not know about this scripture until I “heard” it within and then researched it in the biblical book of Job – “He knows the path that I should take, and when He has tried me, I shall come out as gold.”).
All of this is for “His Name’s sake”. It is for God’s glory, not mine.
“Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death”
This is an honest admission – both from David and myself. Even though You, Lord, guide me in perfect paths of righteousness, there are times when I am going to be disobedient and voluntarily go horribly astray and make decisions that fall outside of the highest path that You have placed before me. There are times when I know that You are my Leader but despite this, through my own frailties and shortcomings, I am still going to selfishly follow my own desires and do things out of my own will that are far from Your perfect will for me. In other words, despite me knowing of your Providence, there are times when I may make the lesser choice, choose the lower path and try to go it on my own. There are times when I will negate the path of life and righteousness and opt for the path of death and ego. Unfortunately, there are times when I choose the valley of the shadow of death instead of the path of righteousness.
“I will fear no evil, for You are with me”
Despite my shortcomings and the repercussions and reaping of my actions, I know that You are still with me. I know that as your sheep, I may have gone astray as sheep often do, but in all of this, I know that You have not forsaken me, abandoned me or rejected me. I know that I may be frail but that You are not. I know that I may sometimes wander off from You but that You will not do the same to me…. And because of Your mercy, Your compassion, Your grace and Your forgiveness, I will fear no evil for You will still be with me.
“Your rod and your staff, they comfort me.”
Your rod and Your staff are tools of protection but they are also tools of discipline which are necessary for my obedience. I find comfort in them because, though I may stray far, your rod and staff will pull me out of the path of destruction and death and allow me to walk with You once more.
You will allow me my free will, hoping that I make the correct choice and highest decision. However when I go outside of this, you will have no problem in correcting me and using whatever situation necessary to bring me back to a place of spiritual obedience.
(This is the reason why you will notice that deeply spiritual people often seem to not get away with doing things that other people seem to get away with. I know it seems horribly unfair and it can sometimes appear that the cruel and unkind seem to have the ways of the world rigged in their favour. Take heart when it seems that God is correcting you far more harshly than He appears to be correcting others who seem to require it much more than you do… This is a sure indication that you have a relationship with Him/Her. I would rather be corrected and restored instead of being disobedient and constantly unfulfilled).
Protect me Lord, but also discipline me when needed.
“You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies”
Wait a minute, Lord, I thought I was a sheep grazing on vegetation and lying down in green pastures but now I am dining at a table? And then too, in front of my enemies? How could I be sheep in one moment and not one anymore in the next?
This speaks of God’s transmutation over your life. You may start off as a sheep with your walk with God but His will for you is that you do not merely remain one forever. When you have displayed such sufficient spiritual maturity, soul growth and evolution through being obedient to His will, it is an indication that you have progressed to the next level. No longer does He have to lead you through green pastures and leafy vegetation in open paddocks and on mountain slopes but He will now prepare a table before you. He is still providing – it is just that the provision is now greater and a lot more personal.
Here comes the interesting part – dining in the presence of your enemies. On one hand, it speaks about God publically demonstrating His/Her favour over your life. And let’s face it, nothing feels better than God publically blessing you in front of people who do not always want to see you succeed – we have all had that experience at some point or the other (and may you experience many more of those).
The difficult aspect about this is having God bring those people into your own personal space again. If I am having a table prepared before me, there’s no question about it, I would prefer only those nearest and dearest to me to be present at this feast. Bumping into a “hater” at the grocery store or gym is already uncomfortable enough. Can you imagine how much more uncomfortable it is having to dine with them in such an intimate setting?
So yes, God will bless you publically in front of people who have openly despised you. It is up to us to:
- Display a level of inner maturity when God allows us to encounter these people once again.
- Trust in God’s will and still allow Him to lead us in paths of righteousness for HIS names sake. You see beloved, this was not about you, this was about God.
So before ranting, raving and causing a scene, have the inner maturity and faith to trust God even in the most uncomfortable of situations.
“You anoint my head with oil, my cup runneth over”
Anoints means to smear with oil as part of a religious ceremony. It is ceremonial, divine, holy… You do not anoint sheep so this once again speaks of one’s transmutation. Neither do you anoint a fool… Instead, you anoint somebody who is going to be effective as a leader. It speaks of God’s appointment over you – that you have been selected, chosen, appointed.
Not only this but Your provision and abundance, Lord, is made manifest again – my cup runneth over. I do not have to worry about whether You will fill my cup or not – it will ALWAYS overflow by Your touch. No longer do I have to worry about grass and water for you have now set before me a table with food and wine. I have become different, so now my nourishment is also different – and none of this was because of my own strength but it was because of You who being my Shepherd. All I had to do – ever had to do – was to be obedient and submissive to your Spirit.
(Interestingly enough, this is exactly what happened to David. Many historians believe that this Psalm was written long before he was anointed by Samuel to become King – in other words, David was still a shepherd when he wrote this. He literally spoke it into his life. Please never underestimate the power of a written or spoken word.)
“Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life”
The word “surely” indicates full confidence. It means there’s no debate, no two ways about it, nothing to question. Hang on, it means I do not have to worry myself about chasing after these things – it follows me! I am the magnet and all these blessings are attracted to me!
“And I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever and ever”
Once again, it is a statement that I have been obedient to God’s will and since I am now fully transmutated and transformed, no longer do I have to be a sheep and sleep in a barn, in a pen or in a shed. Now that I am sufficiently matured, not only have you anointed me but also I get to live in the house of the Lord. I am now housed differently. And I don’t have to merely survive anymore, I get to dwell. This is now my home and it is permanent (“forever and ever”).
So this is my inner invocation when I say Psalm 23 out aloud daily. May every thought you think, every word you speak and every action you perform lead you to your highest destiny and greatest vision for your life. In all things and in all situations – both the pleasant and unpleasant – may we always be mindful (despite the pain and inner turmoil that we may feel) that it is God’s way of turning us from sheep into who He has called us to be.
Be blessed everyone.
